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I asked Rhoda Baxter, a published author, how she fits in writing along with everything else us women have to juggle, here in this guest posts she tells us all about it...
Mrs M asked me how I fit in writing with kids and the day
job. The answer is – I don’t really know. But that’s not a good enough answer,
is it? So here goes.
There are only so many hours in the day. I work four days a
week, have two kids to look after and a husband (who doesn’t take much looking
after as such, but I do have to talk to him sometimes). I also write novels. So where does the writing
fit in? The answer is – anywhere I can.
The first time I went to a writing conference, I met a lot
of other women around my age (ish) who have small kids. We compared notes on
why we write. We all had the same answer. I write because I’m driven to write.
I’m doing it seriously now because it’s the one thing I do for me.
When my Big Girl (now aged 5) was born, I found my life was
completely sucked into orbit around her. Me, as I knew me, seemed to have
disappeared. Something had to be done. I’d started writing when I left Uni. I
finished the first novel while I was on maternity leave (it wasn’t great, it’s
still lying in a box waiting for me to hack it up and reassemble), I had other
ideas I wanted to write up, but there just didn’t seem any time to do it in. And
the need to write was stronger than it had ever been.
When Big Girl was about 6 months old, my husband and I had a
chat about reclaiming who we were. He restarted his hobbies (reading, mainly)
and I dug out my laptop and spent one hour each night writing (once the kids
are in bed, the bottles have been washed, the washing’s been put away etc etc
etc). Sometimes I write when I should be sleeping. About once a week, I have a
non writing night, when Mr B and I hang out together watching Big Bang Theory
and catchup TV.
Whenever I can, I write in my lunchtimes at work, it’s not
great for keeping a crumb free desk or getting a break from sitting down, but
it helps add a few hundred words to the work in progress.
It’s not easy to get all the real life things done in time
to have that last hour each night. There are always more chores to be done than
there is time to do them in. I have a load of routines, which help immensely
(thank you www.flylady.net). I have a
supportive husband, which helps even more (thank you Mr B!).
Some things have to slide. The house looks like ground zero
in a toy explosion, no one has ironed clothes, but we can live with that. I
don’t go out much, I have no other ‘me time’, I definitely don’t get enough
sleep but I can live with that too. Because I get to write books. Some days
it’s just another task to do, some days, when my characters aren’t speaking to
me, it’s enough to drive me to Calpol. Then there are the days when I write a
scene that comes alive – when I can hear it, I can see it and I can’t stop
smiling - then there’s nothing in the
world like it. I’d put up with all sorts of crap just to have another day like
it again.
It’s not that different to bringing up kids, really.
How about you? What’s the thing you’d really like to do, if
only you had the time?
About me.
I live in East Yorkshire where the weather is variable but
the cake shops are excellent. I write contemporary romantic comedy about women
with real jobs and heroes with a sense of humour. I have two kids, a husband
and a day job in Technology Transfer. The rest of the time I’m a sensible grown
up.
You can find me wittering on about writing, science and cake
(not all at the same time) on my website www.rhodabaxter.com,
or on Twitter (@rhodabaxter). My second novel Having a Ball was released by
Uncial Press earlier this year.
Any other format, including non-DRM: http://www.uncialpress.com/Rhoda-Baxter/
Or, you could borrow
it from your ebook lending public
library!
Thanks Rhoda!
As someone who has always had writing ambitions I'm constantly in awe of those people who find the motivation to actually set the wheels in motion and achieve their dreams. One day....
Thanks for having me on your blog Mrs M. It was a good question, and one I think about a lot... when I have the time to think.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this post. I admire Rhoda's determination to write and her discipline in fitting it in around her busy life. Makes me feel a bit lazy, as I could certainly fit more writing in if I tried.
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Rhoda, I am suitably impressed! I did keep the writing going when my kids were little but never wrote anything remotely publishable till much, much later so hats off to you. And how much more satisfying to see the fruits of your 'spare time' in book form as opposed to spending it watching rubbish tv etc. Keep up the good work!
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